New Mexico Fires – The Fear-Of-Loss Continuum

The fires in New Mexico are nothing to joke about. Especially when you consider the fact that so many people are being torn from their homes and thrown in to forced life changes.

Home evacuations with the fear of losing everything are on one end of the New Mexico fires fear-of-loss continuum. On the other end of the New Mexico fires fear-of-loss continuum are the losses of everything due to homes that have actually burned to the ground.

There are many ways to view this fear-of-loss continuum. Another perspective is that on one end of it people are faced with the fear of being forced to let go. On the other end of this fear-of-loss continuum people are literally being forced to let go of their current way of living. Either way, the emotional, psychological, and physiological impacts are great and devastating.

How does one deal with being on the the fear-of-loss continuum?

It is hard to even imagine losing everything. It is also hard to know what exactly to say and do to support someone who has lost everything. But one must start somewhere, and below is my honest, genuine, and meaningful attempt to offer considerations of support. Since I am action oriented and tend to move toward situations head on, I offer the following actions for consideration.

If you are supporting someone who is currently living life somewhere along this fear-of-loss continuum due to the New Mexico fires, perhaps the following will be helpful for you, as you support them.

For the home owners who have to evacuate,

but their homes have not been burned – one of the most important activities for them to participate in is planning. If possible, rise above the fear of the unknown and put energy in to planning for the possibility of loss. This may help shift the focus from fear – to – hope.

Strangely enough, planning for the possibility of loss may help to  shift the focus from the unknown to what can be managed in the present. It is called living in the moment. Oddly enough, planning could also help with the process of accepting and acknowledging what may become an inevitable experience.

For the home owners who have lost everything in the New Mexico fires,

Consider this >>>  1. Accept Help   2. Don’t Blame   3. Live In Today

  1. Accept help from others without judgement
  2. Don’t blame yourself for the loss – it was totally out of your control
  3. Don’t blame family members (and others) for the loss – it was out of their control as well
  4. Keep in mind – this was not only your loss, but your family as well – therefore honor their feelings as you honor yours
  5. Try very hard not to take out your frustrations on your family and others
  6. Your life is today. Be willing to bring together your family and go through some kind of process in which you literally say “good-bye” to your belongings and past life. Often, saying good-bye with a kind of ritualistic process will help with healing and spiritually make space for the new path on which you are being forced to embark
  7. Allow yourself to go through the process of grieving the loss of your past life.
  8. Finally, give yourself time to heal.

More to come…

Darren L Johnson


Elisha Vee-Letting Go CafeWritten by E’zhe (ELisha Vee)

Today I broke out an old friend: my tried and true yellow notepad and a pen. Thoughts kept swirling through my mind; slowly, dully – then quickly and vividly. I kept looking for a muse for my source of Inspiration. Then I Re-Membered that I Am an extension of that Source. I needed look no further. Never without; I searched Within and found the Voice of my own Truth.

This is what I know: I came here to express myself – in every way, shape, fashion and form.

Iʼll break out dancing in the middle of a Wal-mart, if my favorite song is playing. I Love to write poetry and short stories. Letting Go Cafe DancerI Love my computer. I Love Creating works for my clients that exceed their expectations. I Love acting, because I get to stretch my Perception of Self beyond its limits.

I Love to model; I Love Being sexy. I Love deep, meaningful conversation. I Love letting my voice be heard. Canʼt sing though. I wish I could. I Love Being an Inspiration to others, and I Love witnessing others experience their own “aha!” moments. I Love dancing. Magic always happens under the Disco Ball. I Love Being sensual and sexual. I Love taking advantage of all of my senses, in order to enjoy all of the Pleasures of Life. Sometimes I wanna go Vegan.

Sometimes I want to sink my teeth into a NY Strip. I just Love a great meal. Sometimes I want to detox and fast. Sometimes I want to drink all night. Iʼm okay with that, too. Some days I want to fit in. Some days I want to stand out. Some days I just want to be left the hell alone.

But no matter how I choose to show up, I want to be me. The Real Me.

TLetting Go Cafe Dreaminghe Me who has a head full of dreams and a genuine passion for life. The Me who can be afraid of the unknown; yet excited by itʼs newness at the same time. The Me that can relate to people better by hugs than handshakes; by smiles rather than empty gestures. The Me who Loves snow cones and rainbows and fireworks and flowers and balloons and lazy days – just because.

I wonʼt say Iʼll look for any excuse to celebrate life. But I find it inexcusable for me not to
look for such opportunities in each and every day of my life. My obituary will not read,
“Coulda, woulda, shoulda…”

My life is filled with ups and downs, but not with failures. Everything I have experienced has contributed towards making me the person that I Am – in this moment. And I certainly – am not – a failure. I may have lost much, but I understand that it is all part of my Process: LETTING GO of the old in order to make room for the new. I Am on my Journey to Joy, and I Am following my Bliss!

The Path I am on now is different.

Sometimes scary. Sometimes painful. But I move out on Faith and the Knowing that Prosperity is my Birthright. I do not have to justify my existence in order to allow greatness to flow throughout my life. The mere fact that I Am here means that I can be, do, or have anything I desire. Every day people fight and die for what they believe in.

I believe in Me.

Those who know me know that I am a Force of Nature and sometimes not easy to deal with. Those who Love me know that if there is one thing I do very well, it is to Love. I Love my family. I Love my friends. I Love music. I Love art. I Love inanimate objects. I Love for the sheer Joy and exhilaration of the Expression of Love itself. At first it wasnʼt easy for me, but then I discovered the very Essence of who I Am. Trust me – after a while youʼll get the hang of it! Try it – youʼll like it!

The best part of all of this is that at any moment, all of this could change. As I evolve, so does my Truth.

This is what I know.
by Eʼzhe