Ego vs Spirit – You Decide…

Do you live a spirit-focused life? Are your decisions grounded in ego or spirit?

If you had no television, no radio, no other people, AND if you never read newspapers, books, magazines, newsletters, email, etc., then all you would have left to guide you would either be your spirit or your self-made ego. They both inspire conversations in your head, better known as self talk. There is one question that looms regarding the ego and the spirit. It is: “Which one guides your life – ego or spirit?”

To answer that question, one must first discern how to tell the difference between the internal voice of the spirit and that of the ego.

I love the following poem. It was e-mailed to me in 1999. Even though the author is unknown, it hits the nail on the head when it comes to our listening and distinguishing between the ego and the spirit.

I whispered, “God, speak to me.”
And a meadowlark sang.
But I did not hear.

So I yelled, “God, speak to me!”
And the thunder rolled across the sky.
But I did not listen.

I looked around and said, “God, let me see you.”
And a star shone brightly.
But I did not notice.

So I shouted, “God, show me a miracle!”
And a life was born.
But I did not know.

So I cried out in despair,
“Touch me, God, and let me know you are there!”
Whereupon God reached down and touched me.

But I brushed the butterfly away,
And walked away unknowingly.

There are basically two core emotions – love and fear.  All other emotions are spun from these two.

Your spirit is the essence of the energy that you are born into, and it constantly speaks to you. Sometimes you do not recognize it when it speaks. When you overlook the spirit, and tune more into your ego, a struggle ensues —not with the spirit, but between you and your ego. Since the ego is driven by and thrives on fear, there is sense of loss and lack of acceptance that you might feel, as the ego looses control to the spirit over your thoughts and decisions.

The universe gave us a spirit to provide internal guidance. Yet, we have created another version of that spirit to deal with society and all of the various forms of information we encounter every minute. That other version of the spirit is the ego; a mere facsimile of the universal spirit.

The spirit’s focus is love. The ego’s focus is fear, and both exist inside each of us.

The question is: How to we balance the two in our lives?  The answer comes in two words – WITH LOVE.

Love is the foundation from which your decisions about your life should be made. How different would this world be if more of us began every day by asking this question,
“Who and what can I love today?”

Living a “spirit focused” life will change your entire outlook on the world around you.

Try it and you will see.

Letting Go Cafe-Forgive, Let Go, and Pay Yourself

Forgive, Let Go, and Pay Yourself First

payyouselffirst1Some time ago I read a book that offered steps for becoming financially independent. The book is titled, “The Richest Man In Bablylon” by George S. Clason.

One of the steps in Clason’s book is to “pay your self first,” above and beyond any entity or person. That simple step was easy to write, easy to say, and easy to ponder, but the true application of that simple step can be challenging for many people; in part because it is not totally understood.

Today, I have been able to apply that concept in other ways, aside from financial independence, or the pursuit thereof. The notion of paying yourself first can also be applied to loving and forgiving. Sometimes to love and forgive ones self is a payment of a different kind, and the value is priceless.

I have learned, as I strive to perfect the art of letting go of stuff, that to let go of a habit, internal program, or to change your attitude toward someoneforgive 2 or something is challenging. The place to begin is with the person in the mirror. Please note that the art of letting go of stuff is a never-ending process of learning that will last a lifetime, and forgiving ones self is a huge part of that process.

Paying yourself first, when it comes to forgiveness means – starting with you. Forgiving your self is the only way that you will be able to forgive any one else. Seriously. It is true.

Letting go of stuff includes forgiveness. Walt Kelly, in a 1970 Pogo comic strip wrote, “we have met the enemy, and he is us.” I interpret that to mean that we must first point fingers at us, before pointing them at anyone else.

Constantly ask, what was my role in this situation?
-What was my role in the failure of this relationship?
-What was my role in the altercation with that person?
-What was my role as I argued with that person?

Begin with you. Forgive yourself first. Love yourself the most. By doing these things, you will in effect, pay yourself first.

How do you forgive yourself?Forgive1It is just as simple as financially paying yourself first. You must love yourself enough to do so. You must make a sacrifice. You must change your thought patterns. I will give you some steps for forgiving your self. But first let me talk a little more about this whole forgiveness thing, ‘cause it is important.

Forgiving yourself is crucial to forgiving others. According to Harvey Mackay, if you want to get even with someone, then forgive them. That will really get them back. Forgiveness allows you to move from a place of pain and suffering to a place of peace and harmony. For many, holding on to pain, anger, frustration, resentment, and the like is slowly eating away at your mental and spiritual being, and eventually will destroy your physical being. let go 1
So forgive, and begin with you.

Steps that will put you on the path for self-forgiveness are:

  1. Make a list of those you need to forgive (be honest and include your self)
  2. Give yourself permission to forgive by making a claim that it is okay for you to forgive those on your list.
  3. Forgive your self by literally looking in the mirror, at you, and saying, “I forgive you for…”
  4. Contact each person on your list and genuinely forgive them by saying to them, “I forgive you for…” (be specific).
  5. Now, when you forgive those on your list, you must accept their response, no matter what it may be. They may not accept your forgiveness. If they do not accept, you must still accept that and let it go. You can’t force them to accept your forgiveness. Remember you are doing this for you, not for them.

This process of forgiving may not always be easy, but it is definitely worth it. You may find that you forgivenesswill be spiritually fed if you allow yourself to experience the above or some other process of self-forgiving. Forgiving allows you to become better at the art of letting go of stuff, which then allows you to move forward in your life. So pay yourself first and forgive the one who matters the most – YOU.

Until next time..

Steps To Begin Letting Go of Stuff – Today

The definition of Letting Go of Stuff is below.

Below are specific steps to get you started today on your Letting Go of Stuff Journey.

What Is Letting Go?LETTING GO IS…
Letting go is about recognizing when it is time to “stay in” a situation or experience, and when it is time to “get out.” Often, we remain in situations or hold on to past experiences WAY too long. For example, have you ever experienced a friend or parent who is in their 60’s, but is still dressing as if they are still in their 30’s (or worse – in their 20’s)? They are “holding on” to the past experiences and emotions related being 20 or 30 something. Do you know of anyone who might have been angry about something that happened in the past, perhaps years ago, but when they talk about it in the present – they still get just as angry? Do you know of anyone who might still be in love with another, but the other does not still love them (and maybe never did)? Those are all examples of people who are remaining in situations much longer than they should. They don’t recognize the signs and times that represent moving on.

Making a choice to “let go” places you on a life long journey of loving, learning from, listening to, and forgiving yourself.

What Is Stuff - Letting Go CafeSTUFF IS…
Back in the mid 90’s I was under contract to do seminars in the Caribbean. During one of my early morning jogs along the beach, I was trying to find a word that would go well with the phrase letting go. I researched many words. Finally, I stumbled upon the word “stuff.” According to the 9th edition of the Websters New Collegiate Dictionary, one of the phrases the define the word stuff is: “a matter of a particular and often unspecified kind; something introduced into the body by humans.” Stuff consists of negative emotions, guilt, shame, negative internal conversation (self-talk), and unwanted negative feelings. All of these usually lead to toxic relationships, not being able to let go of the past, acting on negative notions about self, and more.

I also believe that the “stuff around you, represents the stuff inside of you.” So if you think this will NOT help you to clean out that storage, office, and/or extra room in the house, think again, because it will.

GET STARTED TODAY – with the following steps.

  1. Get a personal journal. You might opt to use a blog in an effort to share the journey.Get A Personal Journal
  2. Begin by listing everything that you want to let go or change.
  3. Break down your life into categories such as social, work, career, financial, relationships, and so on.
  4. For each category, create a list of things you want to let go, or change.
  5. Pick a category and begin to prioritize your list of items in that category.
  6. Identify one of the top three items on that categorized list.
  7. Once you have identified that one item, set a due date for it to be eliminated. Consider as a deadline due date the fourth Thursday in March, which is National Letting Go of Stuff Day. Each year, on this day, you can measure your success with letting go of the things on your list.
  8. Finally, begin to take the action necessary for you to eliminate that item from your list.
  9. When you can cross out that first item, then move on to the next item on your list and use these same steps.

The above nine steps will get you started. Be patient, don’t overwhelm yourself with lofty goals, and love yourself along the way.